I couldn't sleep the whole night. I tried to call Joe like 20 times but he didn't answer the phone. I sat down on the cold floor next to the phone and cried.
It's been awhile
since I could hold my head high
since I first saw you
since I could stand on my own two feet again
since I could call you
but everything I can't
remember as fucked up as it
all may seem the consequences
that I've rendered I've stretched
myself beyond my means
The lyrics of 'It's been awhile' by Staind rushed into my head. How
true they were!
"That's life, so hard, so unfair!" I thought.
Then suddenly the phone rang.
'-JOE-' Was my first thought.
"JOE??" I answered it hopefully.
"Erm, no. It's Steff."
"Oh! Hi." I said disappointed.
"Where are you? We are waiting for you!"
"Huh?" I asked confused.
"Yeah, we wanted to go shopping for the awards show. Remember?" Steff called happily.
"Oh shit. I'm sorry. I forgot about you!" I apologized.
"No prob. so are you coming now?"
"Steff, I don't thing so!"
"Why? You sound so sad, something wrong with you and Joe?"
"Uhu!" I began to cry again.
"Ohh hun. Should I come to you and we talk about it?" She asked worried.
"N-no. It's ok. I only thing that I don't need anything for the awards anymore." I said while the pix of Joe leaving me alone in the park last night came back to me.
"I'm so sorry Lia! Is there anything I can do for you?"
"No. I think, I just need some time alone now."
"Hmm. Ok. I got to go - the others are waiting. You sure you don't wanna come?"
"Yeah!" I sobbed.
"Ok then. You can call me whenever you want, ok?"
I hung up and turned my pc on. I surfed on www.linkinpark.com and entered the chatroom with the name 'Dusk'. Then I saw it. The name with which Joe entered the chatroom anonymous.
I clicked on it:
Dusk: Hey wanna chat?
Froggy's Advocate: Sure a/s/l?
'He didn't recognized me, good!' I thought.
Dusk: Erm, 16/f/ N.Y., u?
F.A. : 24/m/ Cali how are yaw doing?
Dusk: Not that good.
F.A. : Why?
Dusk: Had a big fight with my b/f
F.A. : Oh, can imagine how you feel. Why did you fight?
Dusk: Coz of my attitude
F.A. : ???
Dusk: Well .... what do you think of 'no sex before marriage'?
F.A. : Oh I see. Well it's not really my thing but I would accept it, you know.
Dusk: I don't think that my b/f would accept it.
F.A. : Did you tell him?
Dusk: No not really
F.A. : How do you know then that he doesn't accept it.
Dusk: Dunno! :(
F.A. : Then go to him and tell him clearly. I'm sure that you're a really nice girl and he'll understand coz he loves you, huh?
Dusk: I dunno.
F.A. : Sure. You know if i would be your b/f, think i would want to show you that sex is such a wonderful thing and that it's part of a relationship. I wouldn't be mad at you coz you never tested it, right? And well if you still wouldn't wanna test it, ... then well I would have to wait till our wedding. lol
Dusk: Maybe you're right but that's what my mum taughed me. She said it's better to do it if you met Mr. Right. And now I feel so insecure if he already is my Mr. Right so I think I have to wait.
F.A.: But look he if really is your 'Mr. Right' and you miss your chance. You'll blame yourself your whole life.
Dusk: Yeah maybe.
F.A. : Don't get me wrong. I'm not into onenightstands but that's my opinion. I don't want a girl for the sex, but if I do it with her I can show her how special she's for me.
Dusk: Hmm, you think I should talk to him?
F.A. : Yeah!
Dusk: Ok thx!
F.A. : No prob, and don't worry too much if he really loves you than he has the same opinion like me.
Dusk: Ok bye
F.A. : BYE
"Was everything ture Joe told me? I dunno!" I thought.
I took my keys and left my apartment.
-Infront of Joe's house-
I rang the doorbell. Some minutes later a window upstairs opened.
"What do you want?" Joe asked cold.
"I wanted to talk!" I looked up to him. He seemed like he was surprised to see me here.
"There's nothing to talk about!" He said while closing the window.
"No Joe! Now listen!!!" I screamed, I didn't care that the whole neighbarhood could hear me.
"You told the girl in the chat that if there's a problem in the relationship she should go and talk to her b/f!"
The window was still closed.
"Yeah the girl 'Dusk' was me, surprise, surprise." I called sarcastically.
"Maybe you remember our chat topic. Yes, it's ture, my mum tought me not to sleep with a guy before marriage. And yeah, guess, I'm still a fucking virgin." I screamed with tears in my eyes.
"That's the thing I wanted to tell you the other night. I wasn't allowed to sleep with you coz of my attitude."
There was still no reaction of Joe.
"Ok, you don't believe me!" I called after some minutes of silence. "Fine then there are no other words than 'Good-Bye', I wish you the best for the future."
I took a last look at the house and walked over to my car.
Suddenly I heard the front door open and then I felt a strong hand on my shoulder:
"Lia? I'm sorry. There are no other words for that what i feel. I don't know if you accept this apology but I really regret what I did. I totally overreacted last night and I was a big idiot."
I looked at him, still with tears in my eyes.
"You know, I told you my opinion in the chatroom and it wasn't just a lie."
There was a long silence in which we just looked in each others eyes.
"I'm sorry, plz forgive me! I'm sure we can rescue this relationship." Joe said softly.
The tears were streaming down my face again.
"Hold me Joe! Just hold me!" I whispered crying and fell into his arms.
"Do you forgive me?" He asked gentle while he was stroking over my back.
"Do I have another choice?" I smiled at him.
I closed my eyes when I saw that his lips approached mine. Then I felt 'em softly kissing me. He started to kiss each inch of my lips then our mouths opened and our tongues flicked around each others.
"Let's go inside." Joe suggested and pulled me in.
-1 hour later-
We were now lying on the sofa, I was on top of him and could hear his regular heart beat in this
"Isn't it strange for you to lie here with me, a virgin?" I asked shyly.
"Ah Lia don't talk selfish. Do you really think I care that you're a virgin?"
He kissed me and whispered in my ear:
"Don't tell anyone but I really don't fucking care."
"So are you still going to the awards with me?" He asked some mins later.
"Well there's a bit of a problem now. I wanted to guy something with Steff and the others. But then I didn't go with 'em. I thought I wouldn't go to the awards anymore coz of our fight."
"Oh I see. Well that means we two have to go shopping, huh?"
I smiled at him cheekily.
"Alright, then let's go. Do you think I'll survive this shopping tour?" He looked at me with his puppy-dog eyes.
"Hmm I dunno but I hope so!"
We took our keys, mobiles and purses and left.
About 20 mins later we arrived at the mall and started our shopping tour. When we passed a shop called 'Dome' I noticed some cool clothes in the window and pulled Joe inside.
I was searching through some shelves when a black, knee-length, leather skirt caught my eye.
"Wow!" I said.
"Hmm leather! Nice, nice!" Joe grinned.
"Yeah I like this one. But I think it's not suitable for the awards!" I pointed out sadly.
"Hmm no. I don't think so. Try it on!" Joe smiled and handed me the skirt.
I searched for a fitting top and found a sliver one.
When I got out of the dressing cabine, Joe's jaw dropped.
"Is it that bad?" I looked a bit sceptically.
"N-no, not at all. You, you look great." Joe mentioned impressed.
"You think I should take it?" I smiled at him.
"Definitely!" He was grinning like a 5-year old boy.
I changed back into my jeans and baby-t and walked to the counter.
"I pay!" Joe put out his purse.
"Oh no Joseph!!!" I whined.
"Yeah, it was my fault that you didn't go shopping with the other girls and it was my fault that we had this argument!" He explained while he was paying.
"Ok, thx!" I took his hand and we walked outside.
The rest of the day we spent with window shopping and later with play station games at my apartment till we both fell asleep in each others arms in front of the
THE END | Fiction